Epilogue

If you’ve ever had the displeasure of staying in a hotel at the same time as a youth hockey team, I’d like to apologize in advance. I’ve been a part of said hockey teams on more than one occasion. We are nothing short of your worst nightmare. There have been hotels that have written rules specifically for hockey teams. We break them every time. There’s just something about packing up and heading out of town that brings out your obnoxious and rebellious side. Mix that times fifteen, and see what happens.

You’ll know if you’ve encountered us; if there is an arcade, you won’t get near a game. If there’s a pool, just walk away. It’s total anarchy. There will be random hallways where knee hockey is being played and you won’t be granted passage. If there’s free breakfast. Go very early or you’ll be eating crumbs. If there is a complimentary computer in the lobby, we are the kids standing in a half circle around it, giggling at porn. You get the idea…

It was two weeks into the new year, and I was en route to St. Cloud for our out of town hockey tournament. I was sitting in the back of an SUV next to Adam, whom I hadn’t seen since New Year’s Eve. We exchanged email addresses, so I’d been communicating with him almost daily. Since that night we spent together, I’ve been aching to be with him. I think about him all the time. I think I’m falling in love.

Sitting in front was Mark, next to his mom, who was obviously driving. Mark and I have been on shaky ground following the events of that night. I’ve put a wall up and he doesn’t seem too interested in trying to break it down. Guilt can do that. In the end, I was hurt by what he and Kayla did. It was pretty rude how they ignored me in my own house. They both tried to blame the alcohol, which might have been a factor, but I told them to leave it alone.  What’s done is done. They don’t even know that I saw them in my bed, and that I know they probably fucked. It bothers me that Mark knew I had a thing with Kayla, and on her last night in town, he hopped in bed with her. Not cool dude. Not cool at all. So yeah, I was cold toward him, but I still sat with him at lunch and talked to him at hockey. It was just on a more surface level than before. I missed the closeness I used to have with him, but I’m just not ready to trust him to that level right now. He hasn’t shown me any reason to think otherwise.

Kayla, on the other hand, what’s the point?  She’s gone and I’ll probably never talk to her again. We had a final farewell together, after Mark and Adam went home. She brought over my painting and I parted with my beanie, which was difficult. She knew the significance of that hat, and I let her keep it. I could tell she was deeply moved by that. I wanted her to have good memories of me if she ever looked back. She did bring the hat to her nose and inhaled.

“It smells just like you. I hope it always keeps this smell.”

We cried a little and hugged a lot. I will miss her. She helped me with so much and taught me a lot.

We arrived in St. Cloud after a couple hours on the road and the party was already raging. We got to our room and Mark was anxious to join the team, that was getting ready to hit the pool. We took turns in the bathroom, getting our swim trunks on, and the three of us raced down to the pool.

I’ve come to the conclusion that there are two versions of Mark. There’s the sincere and quiet Mark that makes you feel like you’re the only person in the world that matters. And there is the ‘all eyes on me’ Mark, that can take control of a room with his wit and charm. For today at least, he was version two. It suited him because the whole team adored him. He’s a natural leader, and pretty funny besides. I watched as the entire team drifted toward him when he jumped in the pool. I stayed back with Adam, clinging to a wall in the deep end.

“It’s nice to finally see you again Adam. I missed you.”

“Yeah. Why haven’t you stayed over?”

“I don’t know.”

“Are you and Mark fighting?”

“No. We just haven’t hung out much.”

“Well that sucks.”

“You suck,!” I replied, splashing him full in the face. This caused a playful fight to break out with a lot of splashing, and grabbing, and dunking. A minute later, Adam’s mom walked in to tell us she was going to a restaurant with some of the other parents, and she’d be back later. I could see the gears turning in Adam’s brain as she walked away.

“Do you want to get out of here?  I don’t really like swimming much.”

“Sure,” I said. “I’m not much of a swimmer either.”

We made a swift, undetected exit, as the entire pool area was in total, full volume chaos. We headed back to the room, that we suddenly had to ourselves. I walked to the corner where I had put my bag and dug out some clean clothes. I faced the wall and changed into some shorts. When I turned back, I saw Adam staring at me smiling. He’d already changed.

“Watch some TV?”

“Sure,” I said.

We hopped onto one of the queen beds and propped some pillows up against the wall behind us. Adam clicked around with the remote until he found ‘The Simpson’s’ which we agreed would be fine.

“How long do you think until Mark gets back?”

“I don’t know. Probably not for a while,” I responded.

“Do you think it’d be ok if we…you know…kissed?”

“You want to, too?  We’d probably hear the door thing, and he won’t be back in like ten minutes or anything.”

Right as I finished speaking, Adam leaned in front of me and kissed me square on the lips. He pulled back with a mischievous smile and I reached out with both arms to draw him back in. We skipped all the soft angel kisses and went right into the deep, passionate ones. I slid down until I was flat on my back, and Adam climbed right on top of me. I loved the feeling of having his weight on me, as I rubbed his flawless, smooth back with both of my hands. We kissed like this for I don’t know how long, but the fire was burning hot. In the heat of the passion, I lowered my hands onto his butt. Rubbing his small globes through his silky shorts. He whimpered and ground his pelvis into me hard, while rolling his butt inside of my busy hands. It felt like we hit the next level, allowing me to explore his body, and him being accepting of it. I had just reached the high point in my young sexual life to this point. With his firm butt in my hands, bouncing on my middle, and his obvious excitement pressing on my stomach, I was getting those distinct tingles in my center.

We kissed and groped for a while longer, when the fear of making a mess of myself or getting caught gripped me. I reluctantly broke off our kiss and told him we should stop before it’s too late. He pouted, but agreed, so he climbed off and laid beside me.

“I wish you and me got this bed together, and not you and Mark.”

“Me too. Maybe we’ll get some more alone time this weekend, somehow.”

“We will. I’ll make sure of it. Gotta take a piss.”

Adam jumped off the bed, but not before I got a swat to his ass.

“Eek!” he shrieked, as he skipped to the bathroom, rubbing his cheek. I loved the fact that I could now playfully slap him, and it wouldn’t be weird.  He returned and we resumed our original set up of watching TV. Only this time, we held hands.

Adam’s mom was the first to return. She came in, looked at us and smiled. “You know, I always thought you two were the better pair. A perfect match. Mark can be so…obnoxious sometimes. You two are my mellow fellows. It’s so nice to see you spending time together.”

Adam flashed his mom a filthy grin. I could tell he knew his mom the same as how I knew mine.

She pressed on, increasing the embarrassment level with every word spoken.

“You know how fond of you he is, Daniel.”

“Ok mom.”

“There are days when you’re all he talks about…”

“MOM!”

“He even gets onto Mark about inviting you over…”

“Hello?”

“Hell. I even like when you come over. It gives my little snuggle-bunny somebody else to cling to…”

“MOM!  ENOUGH!”

“Oh honey. Lighten up. Maybe you two would like to share a bed?  Otherwise I know I’m not going to get any sleep this weekend with you hanging onto me.”

She had no idea how right she was. I couldn’t contain the laughter that escaped my clenched mouth. Adam joined in, but she was none the wiser. Eventually she drifted off to the bathroom to do who knows what.

I couldn’t help myself from taking a little cheap shot at Adam. “Do you want to sleep with me snuggle-bunny?”

He hung out his lower lip, which was too cute, and said “yes, but you don’t have to be mean about it.”

“I’m sorry. I wasn’t trying to be mean. My mom is the same way. I won’t call you that again.”

He smiled and put a quick kiss on my cheek.

“Anyway, I want to sleep with you too. I wish I could all weekend.”

That night we had a team meal in the conference room at the hotel. Spaghetti and meatballs. We had an early Friday morning game to wake up to, so the coach put an early curfew on. It was met with protest, but he reminded us we had three nights at this hotel, so there would be plenty of time for fun. After dinner, most of the team went back to one of the kids rooms to play on his PS3. I decided to just go back to our room and watch TV, as I’m not much of a gamer. Adam came back with me, as did his mom, and she got us a pay-per-view to watch. A couple hours later, Mark returned, so Adam hopped into the bed with his mom. We all watched some TV together for a while, but by 10:30, the TV and lights were off. I was anything but tired, so I laid awake with my headphones on. Occasionally I would turn them off and hear everybody else sleeping. Sometime after midnight, I finally fell asleep myself.

Sometime later, I woke up to some movement on the bed right beside me. I was on the far side of the room, and the movement was not on the Mark side of the bed. I opened my eyes right as Adam slid under the covers beside me. There was a parking lot light right outside our window, and I could see the big smile on his face. He was pretty proud of himself.

He snuggled into me face to face, and whispered “hi.”

“Are you crazy,?” I whispered back.

“Relax. Both of them sleep like rocks. They won’t wake up. Anyway, I just wanted to lay here a little while.”

I leaned into him and gave him a soft, quiet kiss. He smiled from my gesture and nuzzled into me a little closer. I placed my hand on his shoulder and caressed the length of his arm, that was resting somewhere between us. After a few strokes, I moved my hand to his body, gliding my fingers over his ribs down to the uphill curve of his hip. I eventually resigned to just rubbing the area covered by his boxer briefs, as his knuckles awkwardly slid back and forth on my stomach. These weren’t ideal conditions, with limited space, and not wanting to move the bed too much. It was a very cuddly experience, and as innocent as this was, it did feel exciting and dangerous, too.

Then Adam did something I totally didn’t expect. Something that really raised the bar. He scooted his body down the bed a little bit. Just enough for his knuckles to drag across the top of my inevitable erection. At first I thought it might have been an accidental bump, but he continued to do it, over and over, moving it around inside my boxers. He looked up at me with a devilish smile and a hungry glint in his eye. He proceeded to scoot down further yet. Before I had a chance to protest, or rather investigate, I felt his fingers gently cup my balls, causing me to gasp. He ran his fingers up my length and back down a few times. Adam located the button that held my fly closed and pulled the flimsy fabric apart. He slid his fingers inside, and pulled me out through the opening. He wrapped his hand around me and started to ever so gently push and pull on my turgid flesh. It all happened so fast, I was having trouble keeping up. I kissed the top of his head and held my mouth there, for fear of being too loud from his erotic ministrations. He breathed heavily into my bare chest while he continued to carefully stroke me.

Unlike Kayla’s hand, Adam knew where the pleasure spots were, but who would know there way around a boys body better than another boy?  Even with him working so slowly and gently, he was bringing me to the brink. I tapped his shoulder, causing him to pull his head back and look into my eyes.

I whispered, “Adam. You’re gonna make me cum.”

The mischievous smile returned to his face and there was no let up in his movements below. A short time later, I closed my eyes, as my body tensed up, and I shot my orgasm somewhere between us, or on us, as it were. I reached for him and pulled him into me. Kissing him as hard as I dared to.

“You are crazy, aren’t you?”

“Felt good, didn’t it?”

“Yeah…but.”

“You’re welcome.”

“Thanks Adam.”

“You blasted me with your stuff, hehe.”

“Mmm…not my fault. You did it.”

“I know, and it was awesome.”

We cuddled for a while, until he made like he was going to leave. I grabbed him at his waist and shook my head no. I slid my fingers under his waistband and rubbed his hip. I pulled him into me and massaged his perfect, sexy butt, too. I pushed his briefs down his backside and nudged his naked hip, urging him to roll onto his back. He took my signal and rolled the rest of the way for me. I placed my hand on his sunken tummy and started to rub his soft, yet firm body. Gradually my path migrated south, exploring the exposed areas of his pubic mound. I could tell the anticipation was killing him, but I continued on my deliberately slow path. I looked into his hooded eyes and he managed a distant smile. He was already gone, in some other blissful world. I could feel his still concealed erection resting against my hand, as I massaged deeply into his silky, warm groin. I was excited and nervous, to the point of shaking. This was something I’ve wanted for so long, and now that I’m here, I’m having self doubt. The truth is, I’m past the point of no return now, so there’s only one way to go.

I peeled the fabric from under its tubular obstruction and slid my hand over to his waist. He lifted his butt for me, so I could slide his briefs off his other hip, down to his knees. I rode my hand up the front of his slim leg until I felt the soft tissue of his scrotum. I could feel the heat coming off of his expectant erogenous zone. I timidly set my fingertips on top of his unrestricted, warm erection. It reacted with so much throbbing and twitching. It was so alive. I rubbed the silky surface a few times, finally wrapped my fingers around it at the root. I pulled it back gently from his stomach and started to slowly stroke.  Adam let out a long sigh and his breathing deepened as I felt his heartbeat thumping through his impressive vessel. Bigger than my own in every way. Longer and thicker. Entirely too big for his small frame. I desperately wanted to lower the blanket and see him in all his glory, but thought better of it. I lost myself in another world as I continued to express my growing love for him, wanting nothing more than to make him feel so much pleasure.  I committed every detail to memory, knowing I would revisit this moment for many years to come.

For his part, Adam squirmed beneath me, lifting and lowering into my pumping fist. He put his hand on my forearm, gently sliding his fingertips up and down, mimicking the stroking motions as I performed. After several glorious minutes his leg muscles tightened, his back arched, and his wand jumped and pulsed in my grip as he let out a long, low moan, in concert with his rhythmic, seminal release. He rode the wave out, somehow keeping quiet, as his warm fluid ran down my knuckles, a reminder of my achievement.

I gazed at his flushed, content face. His open mouth gasping quietly for air. The blanket rising and falling from the work of his heaving chest below. His eyes fluttered open, catching me staring down at him. He swiftly lifted his head, placing a hard kiss on my mouth.

“That was…wow,” he whispered into my face, barely concealing his elation. “Oh man…wow. Thank you Daniel.”

“The pleasure was all mine.”

He rolled back onto his side, and snuggled closely into me and we held each other silently.  With every waking moment, I fell a little bit harder for him. He was an absolute dream come true, and I was the luckiest boy alive. We remained tangled like that until I woke up and saw I slight pink on the horizon out the window. I woke him as gently as I could and he snuck back into the other bed, pulling his underpants up as he walked away. I felt a loneliness with his absence, so I rolled over toward Mark. He was no Adam, but he was my alleged best friend, and a warm body to selfishly cuddle with. If what Adam said earlier was true, I could steal some warmth from him and he wouldn’t wake up. He was lying on his back, so I threw my arm across his stomach and melted into him.

A laid awake thinking about so many things. Here I was lying next to Mark. The place where it all started. While Kayla was opening my naive eyes to the world of sex, I always had my lust-filled desire trained on Mark.  All the while, he was probably baiting me, and I never took the risk to follow him. Then something broke down between him and I. We were drifting apart, and Adam walks in, offering me everything I ever wanted. Add the Kayla and Mark stuff. What a mess.  Now, as I lay here, holding Mark, I realize I still have strong feelings for him. What is wrong with me?  I feel like such a whore.  Is this normal?
I mean, who falls for brothers?  I’m starting to think I’d want to get into the pants of any boy that says hi to me, no matter what he looks like. Never mind the fact that Mark is freaking hot, and Adam is his clone, except even hotter, in my opinion. I just don’t know anymore. It’s like I have this emptiness and anyone who dares to be around me better be prepared for me to try and suck them in.

As if things couldn’t get worse, Mark woke up. He spotted my arm draped over him and he set his arm on top of mine. He squeezed my triceps and fell back asleep holding me. It was such a simple gesture, but given where he and I have been lately, it was huge. Like a peace offering. I laid awake some more, overthinking like I always do.

Morning arrived to the annoying sound of the alarm clock. It was at least three hours earlier than I would have preferred. Mark’s mom, being the rockstar that she was, offered to run to the lobby to grab some donuts and juice to bring back to the room, so we could stay lazy for a bit longer. After she left, Mark said in what I took to be a serious voice, “Daniel. Give me your hand.”

I did as he said, sending my hand over, under the blanket. He grabbed my wrist and positioned himself in a way where my hand was right up against the middle of his ass. Right as I was saying ‘wtf’ to myself, he farted, right on my hand. It was freaking disgusting. I actually felt the air pass through his underwear. I yanked my hand back and screamed.

“You sick bastard!”

“Ah haha!”

Needless to say, it was go time. I was on him like flies on stink. Headlocks. Arm-bars. Kicking. Punching. You name it, I did it. We were a hysterical, tangled mess. Fighting and laughing. Like an idiot, I let him pin me, only to have him rip another one, right on my stomach. I bucked him off and I swear his head nearly hit the ceiling.

“Ewe!  Stop it sicko!”

“I can’t help it. It’s the spaghetti.”

I held him down, to make sure he didn’t try it again. Mark was out of control with laughter, and if I wasn’t the target, I’d be right there with him. As things started to settle down, Adam emerged from the other bed. He stood at the side of his bed and had a good, arms over the head stretch, as he forced out an exaggerated yawn.

“The Hell Adam?  Did you piss yourself,?” Mark asked, looking at the obvious discoloration in the front of his ridiculously tight, deliciously revealing black boxer briefs. I held my breath and my eyes threatened to pop right out of my head. I knew full well what that stain was.

Adam, ever so cool under pressure, simply said, “why are you looking at my dick, Mark?  Pervert.”

Mark launched a pillow at him while saying, “bed wetter.”

Adam turned toward the bathroom, lifted his leg, and let loose a rather big fart. He took a few steps and looked over his shoulder toward us. He said “spaghetti,” and continued on his way.  Stopping only once to lift his leg again and shake it.

Mark and I both cracked up. If this was any indication of the day ahead of us, it was going to be outrageous.  I don’t know if I can clearly describe how much this simple little exchange with Mark meant to me. Sure, it was gross of him to fart on me, but it was more than that. On a different level, it told me that we were heading back to how we used to be.  It felt good again. For lack of a better term, we kissed and made up.

I got further evidence from Mark’s next comment. “You liked that, didn’t you?”

“Liked what?”

“Touching my butt?”

“Maybe without the gas!” I said, slapping his arm.

He smiled up at me, with my head propped up on my arm. “This is so awesome. The tournament. You back on the team. The hotel. You ready for the game?  How’d you sleep?”

“I slept pretty good. I was up for a while, but yeah, I’m ready to play.”

Adam came back out of the bathroom, and stage dove onto our bed, across my and Mark’s bodies.

“Ugh!  Get off, dork,” Mark whined, half serious. Adam squirmed his way around, until he was squeezed in between us, under the blanket. He nonchalantly reached for my hand and laced his fingers through mine, while trading humorous insults with his brother.

“This’ll work fine,” he commented out of nowhere.

“What d’ya mean,?” Mark asked.

“This. It’s cozy. Sleeping with mom is weird. It sucked.”

“Dude. Kind of tight if you ask me. Sleep on that chair over there.”

“Yeah right. You sleep with mom.”

“No way.”

Adam shifted the focus to me. “What about you Daniel?  Do you think this’s big enough?”

“Well, we’re all kind of bunched up in the middle. It’d probably work.”

“Adam’s a spaz. I’m not sleeping next to him.”

“I’ll take the middle,” I offered, and Adam gave my hand a tight squeeze.

The day went really well. Mark and I were back in business. We won both of our games. I played fine. The team seemed happy to have me back. Adam sat next to me at Pizza Hut when the whole team went out for dinner. He was as normal as can be, if not a bit more flirtatious than usual. I must admit that as much fun as the hockey and hanging out with the team was, I was way more excited about getting back to the room and going to bed.

We did get back in the evening, got cleaned up, and changed. Mark’s mom was going to hang out in the lounge with some of the other parents and the team was all going to hang out at the pool. I agreed to join them and I could tell it bothered Adam that I was passing up an opportunity to be alone with him.

When we were getting ready to go, Adam said in an unnaturally somber tone “I think I’m staying here. I don’t feel too good.”

With slumped shoulders, he went into the bathroom and shut the door behind him.  Mark shrugged it off and said, “let’s go.”

I could sense that Adam was lying, and I felt wholly responsible, so I said “I’ll catch up with you in a minute. I gotta take a dump.”

“Nice. See ya there poopface.”

With Mark gone, I went to the bathroom and tapped on the door. “Adam. You ok?”

He didn’t immediately answer, so I tapped again. “Adam. What’s going on. You’re scaring me?”

Finally, I heard his signature two pack of ciggies and a bottle of whiskey a day voice say, “it’s open. You can come in.”

I slowly walked in, spotting Adam sitting up on the counter with his legs dangling over the edge. His red eyes told me he’d been doing some crying.

“Hey. What’s wrong Adam?”

“Nothing.”

I reached out for his hand, placing his long, slim fingers in my palm. “Yeah right. Why are you so sad?”

He looked up for the first time, meeting my eyes, before glancing down again. “I just was hoping you’d want to hang back with me again.”

“That’s what I thought. So why don’t you come with, and we can hang out together there. You and me.”

“I don’t know. You and Mark want to hang out, so whatever.”

“Hey. There’s no reason we can’t all hang out. Anyway, Mark will probably be acting all crazy with the rest of the guys.”

“You said you wanted to hang out with me alone this weekend, but now that we can, you’re going with Mark.”

“Mark and I are getting along really good for the first time in forever. I kind of don’t want to ruin that again.”

“Yeah, but then you won’t want to hang out with me again.”

“Think Adam. If me and Mark hang out more, that means more sleepovers, so we can see each other more. Hell, I invited you into our bed for the rest of this weekend. Do you really think I don’t want to see you anymore?  I want to see you all the time.  Adam, I really like you, like way way a lot.”

I sat my hands on his thighs and rubbed them gently. “Why don’t you come to the pool with me. We’ll have more fun later in bed. Besides, nobody can see our hands underwater. The pool could be fun, too.”

Adam lifted his head and smiled. He knew I was making sense, and deep down inside, I could tell he wanted to hang out with me at the pool. I leaned into him and kissed his pretty mouth. “I’ll hang out with only you at the pool. I promise.”

Adam placed his hands around my neck, and I picked him up off the counter. I walked us out of the bathroom, which was no easy task, and we kissed a little while with Adam gripping my neck, and his legs crossed around my waist. I set him down, for fear of dropping him, and said “let’s go.”

“Ok,” he said cheerfully, and we made our way to the pool.

Swimming was fun and I know Adam was happy that he came along. True to my word, I spent all my time with him. A detail that didn’t go unnoticed. He thanked me for it, on our way back to the room. After a quick change of clothes, Mark was off to the ever popular PS3 room. He understood my general dislike of video games, so he didn’t protest my decision to stay back at our room.

“Hmm. Looks like we got the room to ourselves. I mean, unless you were gonna go to play video,” I said sarcastically.

“Yeah,” Adam replied enthusiastically, while putting on his shoes. “What room number is it?  Do you know?”

“I don’t know,” I said, suddenly shocked and sad. My voice sullen and quiet.

“I’ll figure it out, I guess. See ya later Danny.”

“K.”

Adam walked out of the room, leaving me alone and feeling rejected.  Thirty seconds later he stormed back into the room. “Ahh haha!  I got you!”

I launched a pillow at him, shouting insults and obscenities. I did a fair bit of pouting, too. This turned into a wresting match, which turned into a bit of kissing and grabbing. We settled into just watching a movie together. Hands held and happy.

That night in bed, Adam was a party pooper. In fact, he fell asleep when we were all watching TV after Mark and his mom got back.  I held out hope that he’d come around at some point, but he was out for the entire night. To be honest, I don’t even think he moved once.  He was sleeping on his stomach, which is something I could never do, and a few times during the night, I slid my hand under his shirt and rubbed his back. Not because I wanted him to wake up. More because I loved the closeness and wanted to feel him.

Mark, on the other hand, was up to some of his old tricks. While I was laying on my back, and because the bed was pretty crowded having three of us, we were all constantly touching. Mark rolled into me, like I did to him the night before, and held onto my waist. He gently pinched me a few times, to see if I’d react. I didn’t, even though I felt it. A few minutes later, he slid his hand down my body, causing his arm to land right on my crotch. I thought the increase in my heart rate would blow my cover, but he left his arm there for quite a while. He gave me another pinch and actually shook my body too. Getting nothing from me, he made his next move, drawing his arm back, until his hand was atop my semi-aroused penis.

There was a time when I had decided I would end his secret exploration the next time he did it, and find out his motivation. I really wanted to be an active participant in my sexual adventures. However, things had changed with my blossoming relationship with Adam. I don’t know if getting this in the open is the best thing to do now. In my panic, I did nothing but play dead. He didn’t do nothing more than just leave his hand there for a while. When he did pull his hand away, he brought his leg up on top of me. He rested his head on my chest and threw his arm back around me. He fell asleep this way. It was very comforting, but also confusing.

I woke up the next morning, on my side, nuzzled tightly into Adam. I had the flat of my hand resting comfortably on his lower back. Behind me was Mark, spooned up tightly against my body, his arm draped over me, hugging snugly to my bare chest. If there was ever a perfect snapshot to define the predicament I found myself in right now, this would be it. What a fine mess my heart has made of my life. I loved them both so dearly.

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11 responses to “Epilogue

  1. Hello David
    A lovely evocation of 'boys being boys', and of young love. Would that I'd had the courage to follow my instincts at that age, I might have had some special memories, too. But I was always too scared, and it's 40 years too late to repair the damage.

    Love & best wishes
    Sammy B

    Like

  2. Smut!

    Haha, just playin!

    That was a real good chapter. I get why you wanted to leave it the way it happened. That's your memory of it, and anything else would be an injustice to what happened. Sounds like it was an amazing weekend. And not a bad place to wake up!

    Can't wait for book 3!

    143

    _Kevin

    Like

  3. Boy, this is a really good one, so much introspection there, such a detailed expression of how someone feels inside.

    This is a really large literary exercise. I used my word processor to gauge the size. It shows over 5600 words, over 23000 characters. This is really an accomplishment for a young writer.

    I found it really interesting hearing about how a school-age hockey team invades a hotel during an away tournament.

    Daniel exhibits a really mature attitude in his subsequent dealings with Mark and Kayla after the traumatic New Year’s night. He still managed to have a nice farewell meeting with her and despite what happened he is grateful for the time he spent with her and the experiences and education she gave him. Wherever she is, I’ll bet she still treasures the beanie he gave her, knowing the special meaning it had for him. I’ll bet he still has and likes the painting she did. I’d still like to see it.

    I guess he will never know what actually happened between Mark and Kayla that night unless sometime in the future Mark talks about it, brags maybe?

    His analysis of Mark’s dual personality seems right on target. With this understanding and a little forgiveness, he can continue to benefit from his friendship.

    Adam is definitely a special person. He requires a lot of attention from the one he admires. It’s going to take some special and careful balancing for Daniel to deal with these two brothers in the future. I am sure the continuing story will make for some interesting reading. I’m looking forward to the next phase of the story.

    Adam’s mom is also a special and understanding person.

    I’m amazed at what Daniel and Adam accomplished in the same bed with Mark on that special night at the hotel. It took more courage than I could have ever mustered. I guess teenage lust can make that happen. You did a good job of describing a very memorable experience.

    Daniel experienced some extreme ‘lows’ in his young life but also some extreme ‘highs’. I would gladly exchange lives with him during that period of development rather than to have had the dull, boring, no experiences life I had. I believe it’s better to have had wide swings of life experiences than no swings at all. The ‘highs’ balance out the ‘lows’ in my opinion. I’m happy to read about how other folks lived.

    Your good work continues to amaze me. You are indeed a special person. – Aof

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  4. The sensuousness of this chapter put butterflies in my stomach, tugged at my heartstrings, and kept my penis flacid (yea, prolly TMI, but I felt it important to my next point). There was ZERO pornographic aspects to it, but such a profound undertone of love and happiness, that my jealousy notch was cranked up to 11. Mostly, because I blew a chance at summer camp myself with Ryan, that very well could have turned into something similar on a few levels. Obviously not identical, but fuck, I have so many regrets about that moment and not taking it, and it made me so happy for Daniel that he was able to seize the opportunities in front of him. Though Daniel was stronger back then than I was when I was in summer camp. He's grown up so well and stronger, and is such an admirable person…

    I wish nothing but the best for you always, David. Thank you for sharing this profound moment, it was indeed very moving, and evoked such a wondrous cacophony of feelings.

    I spent the night with a friend not long ago, in a situation not unlike your hotel room for sleeping arrangements, and spent a wonderful night cuddling with my friend C in bed, opposite two other friends sleeping in the room. It's going to happen again in another couple of months, and, I'm now wishing that my evening with him ends up in some ways like what you just wrote. I have feelings for him, and, I'm pretty sure he does for me, too. A lot of our mutual friends tell me we'd make a good couple, at least. But I mention this because after reading your epilogue, it's given me something to aspire to in some small way.

    Love, always!
    -D

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  5. OK, I'm all atwitter. What a wonderful wrap up to the angst of the past few chapters. Erotic, yes. But I agree with you that it would have been extremely difficult to convey the emotions and reactions and feelings without the actual sex being there. I am finally smiling again for Daniel (and Mark and Adam). And their mom HAS to know something's up with her kids. They're not blind, you know!

    This was, I am sure, a momentous experience for you. Amazing how travel teams can bring out the best (and worst ;-)) in people!

    Peace <3
    Jay

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  6. Thanks again for sharing your story, David. You are recreating the moods and feelings so effectively. I look forward to reading how the journey continued.

    Bill

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